One year down....

I am coming up on a year of marriage in a few weeks and I have some thoughts.

Most say it is either the best year, or the worst year of your life. I say it is both. You start out with the person you know that you are going to love with all your heart for all eternity. Sometimes, in those hard times you can think, I love you but I don't like you at this moment and one more word and I might take "love" completely off the table. That is where I found a partner. Someone who is with you, wether you like them or not, they are there and going to be facing all the realities with you.

This of course isn't perfected in the first year by any means, just merely introduced. And I think that is the greatest thing I have learned. I have thought a few times this past year about how my life was easier not married. I thought about my freedom and how I could be so selfish and nobody cared. I have to say for a least a few hours on three separate days I longed for that again.

When you are facing a change that only requires experience I think that can be allowed, a few times. But then I think about my future and how my husband is everything apart of that. And it means having little fights, disagreeing, some tears and lots and lots of 'sorry's' and 'I love you's'. Because no matter how wonderful my friends are, loving my family can be, my husband is my partner.

I still look at my wedding ring and day dream. I think I had the best wedding in the world. It was small and special. My reception was the greatest party ever in my honor. It was a celebration of everything I loved... including my husband. I can't think of that day and time without smiling.

I will also be about 6 months pregnant on our year mark. What a wonderful feeling it is to share this time with the person that loves you even when you are getting sick in his beloved car. Because of this great blessing of out baby boy, I have completely no secrets from my husband. He has seen me on my worst days, worst moods and ugliest sick days. The day I asked him if I could just die instead of living (insert eye roll) he went to the store 4 different times trying to find the drink I could keep down. That is patience.

So we are almost a year and I don't think I would change it for anything. We have had our ups and downs and came out respecting each other more than before. Loving is easy, it is co-existing we had to learn.

I love my husband very much. I still call him "boyfriend", he still calls me "brit-brit". I still think he is the funniest person on earth, he still agrees. We still can't make up our mind about anything, and we still argue about whose fault that is. We still settle disputes with a game of UNO, he still cheats. We still say, "I love you", even when we are flaming mad. We still argue about me not writing him on his mission, I am still married to him for time and all eternity. I still think he is a stud and flattered he chose me.

Thank you dear husband for a wonderful year. I appreciate you and I can't wait to meet our son with you. I am terrified for change, so you hold my hand. I am always safe with you and always have a date to bring. Thank you for always kissing me goodbye. I love you so very much. -Brittany