Thursday, October 9, 2014

Faith, Prayer and just a bit of me

I don't always share things like this, but it is a big part of who I am.

Sometimes I get really overwhelmed. I start thinking about my future, I make a step by step plan. Before I realize it, my next 10 years is planned to the "T" and I am ready for the 10 year pay off! But wait, it has been only a day and the first steps are usually the longest and hardest. I am easily discouraged and this normally results in me spending the day in PJ's.

I feel anxious, like the feeling you get when you wake up and realize you just slept through your big test and have to wait for the teacher to decide if you can retake it. I am frustrated that I can't skip ahead. Time and money are never on my side.

Then, when I am quiet and still enough, even if it is just for a few minutes I think of a song I learned in church when I was little. I don't ever remember learning the song, but it is pretty much how I start my prayers. (Well I sing the first verse in my head as I am preparing to pray) 

It goes:
"Heavenly Father, are you really there?
And do you hear and answer ev'ry child's prayer?
Some say that heaven is far away,
But I feel it close around me as I pray.
Heavenly Father, I remember now
Something that Jesus told disciples long ago:
"Suffer the children to come to me."
Father, in prayer I'm coming now to thee."

I can pray and I know someone is listening. This past week my church had a televised conference, where the leaders of the church spoke. We call it general conference and it happens twice a year. For us it is like the super bowl, only it lasts 2 days and is 10 hours total in length. In that time we hear talks from many different leaders, from different places each giving council and guidance as directed from the our Heavenly Father. 

I surround myself with different people, from different cultures and beliefs. I try not to offend anyone with my beliefs because I don't want to be pushy. We are all given agency on this earth and counseled not to judge one another. (And I certainly am in no way fit to be a judge of any sort!) Because of this, I feel I don't always share what I know. If asked out right I would never deny it, that is for sure, but to offer up the words willingly, not often. 

So today as I am sitting in the rocking chair, watching my son sleep and worrying about the next "crucial five years" I remember a talk given by Elder Scott last week. He spoke about 4 tools that could bring us peace. The first was prayer. 

Elder Scott said, 

"Choose to converse with your Father in Heaven often. Make time every day to share your thoughts and feelings with Him. Tell Him everything that concerns you. He is interested in the most important as well as the most mundane facets of your life. Share with Him your full range of feelings and experiences."

"Family prayer should be a nonnegotiable priority in your daily life."

This is what I know, what I believe and the truths I follow. 
It helps me on days like today when I feel inadequate.
Heavenly Father is a prayer away.





For the rest of Elder Scott's talk click here.
For the rest of A Child's Prayer song click here.
For the entire LDS 2014 October Conference click here.

Still alive.

I have thought a lot about the BLOG. I am Mommy now, so time is not ever my own. I thought about trying to capture each day and writing it down. That thought was out the door before I could even finish it. I thought about deleting it, but I like reading what I wrote years ago. (It's that embarrassing, goofy feeling like: Oh dear... did I really do that?) So I decided that it will be what ever I feel like. And maybe more than one post a day. Maybe zero for a week.

I want to write down my thoughts... why not here?